8 Powerful Ways to Boost Confidence
Each of us is born with unlimited potential to become a leader that positively impacts & changes the world. As we grow older we start to develop judgements about how we look, how we rank compared to others, and beliefs about what is possible and impossible for us.
These judgements, beliefs and limitations are mostly absorbed by the people & the environment we surround ourselves with.
Eventually most people develop a belief that you can only feel confident if you already have external reference (proof) of success. The problem with this belief is that unless you have confidence first, your chances of being successful at something new is vastly decreased. And that feeling of lacking confidence stops most people from even trying in the first place! They fail before they even start.
Fake it Till You Make It or Real Confidence?
True Self-confidence doesn’t come from what we can do. It comes from who we are and what we believe about ourselves. It doesn’t rely on an external reference, it doesn’t depend upon what someone says. It’s a feeling of certainty within ourselves that we know both consciously, but more importantly, is an unconscious (habit-like) behaviour.
Anyone can pretend to have confidence, using their will-power to make themselves act in a certain way, but REAL CONFIDENCE is where your behaviour, without even knowing it, is congruent and effortless aligned with your sense of self-confidence. You just do things confidently without having to ‘talk yourself into it’.
The biggest lack of self-confidence signs are:
- Hesitation in asking for what you want
- Not trusting your own judgement
- Avoiding interaction with someone new
- Displaying ‘weak’ body language
- Fearful of trying new things
- Deliberate self-sabotage
- Fear of Rejection
- Resenting Successful People
- Having no motivation to take Action
If you act confidently in front of people, but feel like a ‘fraud’ within yourself, your behaviour will ultimately be influenced by your true lack of confidence. This is why making unconscious changes, is more powerful & effective, than all other often repetitive, & time-consuming, will-powered techniques.
How do you reprogram yourself to have a healthy level of self-confidence?
The only way to reprogram your unconscious mind, that part of you that makes life effortless and easy is by removing your limiting beliefs about yourself and replacing them with more empowering, confidence-generating beliefs.
In working with hundreds of one-on-one clients, and training over 6000 practitioners, the most effective way to create these changes is by using a combination of Hypnosis & Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP).
Both Hypnosis & NLP, when used correctly, influence the unconscious mind directly, strategically removing and replacing behaviours, beliefs, values, feelings & thoughts with something more desirable and positive. NLP & Hypnosis work perfectly together, and classically speaking, Hypnosis IS a part of NLP, anyway.
NLP is like removing the core of the problem, like replacing a faulty engine on a broken-down car. Hypnosis is like ‘tuning-up’ the car now that it has that new engine, to get even more optimal performance out of it.
How do you reprogram yourself today without Hypnosis & NLP?
If you don’t have Hypnosis or NLP training there are still some things you can do to boost your confidence. Here is a list of 8 things you can do:
- Goal Setting
- Visualise Success
- Focus on Your Strengths & Love Yourself
- Be Present and In The Moment
- Exercise A Little Each Day
- Contribute To Someone Else
- Surround Yourself With Uplifting People
- Find a Resourceful Identity To Live Up To
Create a list of goals you want to achieve and ideally, include some visual representations of these goals (vision board), and place it somewhere in your environment where you will see it frequently. This helps to re-program your mind to recognise opportunities to make these goals happen.
Close your eyes, and imagine yourself achieving each of these goals. Feel what it is like to have it. What do you hear in this moment? What do you see in this moment? What are you saying to yourself in this moment? What else do you notice about this moment? Spend a few minutes feeling what it would be really like to have each goal. This creates the emotional ‘fuel’ needed to move towards your outcome, as well as getting you into a positive, resourceful state. You’ll feel much more motivated to take action after doing this.
Create a list of all the great things you can do, all your strengths, all the value you have to offer. Resist the old temptation to beat yourself up, and balance the good with the bad. You are not allowed to think negatively during this process. Only list the benefits, strengths, and things that you love about yourself. This develops a programming to focus on the positives in life. Yes, the world has a lot of good in it and a lot of bad. You get to choose what you will focus on. Focus on the good and you’ll enjoy life more, and it will help you get your outcomes faster.
Most people’s biggest enemy to confidence is their negative self-talk. Shut down your negative self talk by being present with the people you are interacting with. Focus your attention on them and understanding them. This takes away your internal focus, reducing your self-talk by placing your attention outside yourself. Studies has shown that this increases people’s self-confidence by 67%
Research has shown that doing just a little exercise consistently each day, increases people sense of self-worth & confidence by 79%. It’s not about how long your exercise for, or how much you do, just as long as you are doing a little bit each day, your hormones associated with well-being will increase whilst your stress hormones will decrease.
With your list of strengths, now find someone that you can help by employing your strengths. Contributing to someone else, demonstrates the value you actually have to offer, and gives you a sensation of what it is like to be considered ‘knowledgable’ on a specific topic, and therefore growing your confidence.
Human beings are a herd-animal. We crave social interactions. We all have a need to feel a level of significance and connection from others. Make a conscious decision to surround yourself with people who believe in you, who inspire you, who positively encourage you to do more, achieve more and be more. Studies have shown that the people closest to us, impacts our sense of confidence and can help us take necessary risks to succeed.
If you believe you are a chef, you’ll cook meals often. If you believe you are an athlete, you’ll likely train and exercise often. We don’t do what we are capable of, we do what our self-held identities align with.
Maybe your self image needs an upgrade, so a quick way to explore your resourcefulness and range of confidence is to take on an identity of someone who is more resourceful than you. In a challenging situation ask yourself “What would Superman/Wonder Woman do right now?” or ask yourself “What would Richard Branson or Oprah Winfrey do in this situation?”. This changes your focus away from finding excuses to finding solutions and opportunities.
Find an identity that you can associate to, therefore changing your focus, and influencing your behaviour to become more resourceful and more confident.
Confidence starts from within Just like fitness, health & money, it needs to be cultivated, developed and nurtured, to get the best results. Anyone can be anything they want to be, can achieve anything they want to achieve, when they are backed by the resourcefulness of being self confident.
- NLP & Hypnosis are the most powerful & effective tools for changing your undesirable behavioural patterns
- Don’t wait for external references to know you have confidence in something
- Focus on being present, exercise daily, Visualise Success = Confidence
Are you interested in learning Hypnosis, in a fun and engaging way?
Sign up for your FREE online training at www.learnhypnosis.com.au
About the Author:
Shane is the co-founder, CEO and Head trainer for Australian Success Academy, having trained and worked with over 6000 people around Australia in learning the incredible power of the human mind, ranging from Hypnotherapy, Neuro-Linguistic Programming and Public Speaking.